leaving

By the middle of May, I was ready to resign from the LDS church. There were, however, some things that I had to face before that happened.
          
 At the time, I was going to the same ward (congregation) as my youngest sister. In order to spare her the ward gossip that would likely follow the news of me leaving the church, I decided it would be best for me to change wards. Due to the KC temple being open and dedicated in May, I had to wait until regular church services were in session again before I could tell my Bishop that I wanted to move to a family ward. Some people may think I was a coward, but I didn't want my Bishop to blame himself for me leaving the church, so I didn't tell him my intentions.
When church services were in session again, I told him I wanted to change to a family ward and told him that it was time for me to leave the University ward. I deeply respected my Bishop at the time and I still do. He was somewhat liberal for an LDS Bishop and I always admired him for that and for doing what was right by his ward members. He is sincere and loving and I consider him to be a true and faithful Christian man.
        
 At the end of May, I  went to the family ward and spoke with a member of the ward bishopric and asked him to transfer my records there. The weeks following that were spent telling several family members that I planned to leave the church.
    
By the beginning of June, I had told several of my siblings, but I hadn't told my parents yet.
I was very afraid of what my parents would say when I told them I planned to leave the LDS church. I knew some people who had been shunned by their family when they left the LDS church. I didn't think this would happen to me, but I knew that my relationship with my parents would never really be the same once I told them of my decision.

In the early morning (around 2 am) on June 7th, I emailed my Mom and Dad. In the most heartfelt and honest way I could, I told them my decision to leave the church. To date, it is the hardest letter or email I've ever written. I was fortunate that they responded that same day. I knew they would disagree with my decision, and they did. But they also gave me assurance that they would continue to support me in whatever manner I need support in. To this date, my parents have continued to support me emotionally and when I need it, financially. To this date they have not picked a fight with me about my decision. They have continued to show me love and I am truly lucky that this has been the outcome as far as my relationship with them is concerned.

One of my parents did say in their email, that they didn't believe I could really be happy without the LDS church. This statement hurt me the most out of all of their words.
This to me is evidence of how the LDS indoctrinates their members to believe that no one can truly be happy unless they are LDS. They assume that they can read the minds of every person on the earth and assume that those people are really unhappy. The problem with this is that no one has the right to tell another person that they "aren't really happy."  Unless they've invented a way to read people's minds...I know that this kind of doctrine and belief is not only false, but extremely psychologically damaging. 
True believers of the Christian religion know that their happiness comes from the acceptance of Jesus Christ, not from an organization. 

It is also hypocritical for an organization to tell non members that they can't be happy unless they join the organization when...that organization isn't truthful about the complete history and origin of its doctrine/beliefs. 

So once I had told my parents, I was was ready to officially resign from the LDS church. I sent my resignation letter to Salt Lake City the week of June 10th by certified mail. I received the confirmation that it had been signed and delivered on June 14th.

June 14th- the day I was set free from lies, betrayal, and hypocrisy. This day and many days afterwards were extremely joyous for me. I felt a wonderful feeling of freedom, joy, happiness and endless possibilities for my life.

This summer was the beginning of my new life.

I was free to act, think, believe, and respond according to the "dictates of my own conscious"(to steal a phrase from Joseph Smith). 

It was the beginning of de-coding many of the thoughts, reactions and behaviors that I had been taught for the past 35 years. Also, it was the beginning of "the stages" that most ex Mormons go through.